Hide: Downunder Ink Book 2 by Bronwyn Stuart

Author:Bronwyn Stuart [Stuart, Bronwyn]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Bronwyn Stuart
Published: 2021-01-28T18:00:00+00:00

Chapter Seventeen

Ben

I’m a confident guy. Sure of myself. But I haven’t dated for a long time. I haven’t shown this side of myself to anyone in a long time. It can be frightening. It can be off-putting. I thought Jen would be turned off by my caveman routine, what she’s seen of it, but judging by the shallow breaths she’s taking and the glazed look she keeps giving me, I’d say she’s more than turned on. I bet if I were to find her pulse point right now, her heart would be hammering in her chest.

My voice is pitched low as I walk her through the experience. I find her shoulder in the dark and let her hair wash over my knuckles. “First the appetiser will come. The waiters are vision impaired. No one can see anything at all. Then there will be a main course and then dessert. You can use a knife and fork. Or you can use your fingers.”

“They didn’t take our orders.”

“You don’t place one. You eat what comes out. Part of the experience is trying to guess what you’re eating.”

“I’m not sure about this.”

I want to reassure her but it isn’t vulnerability in her wavering voice, it’s sass. I squeeze her thigh and say, “You’re going to love it, don’t worry.”

She’d make a terrible submissive if I was into that, but I was serious when she asked me if I was a dom and I said no. I don’t need to dominate. I just need her to do what she’s told every now and then. She keeps asking ‘what am I doing here’ and I don’t have an answer for her. Not yet. I don’t even fully understand this attraction I feel towards her. She’s everything I’ll never be. Reckless, head strong, full of attitude and…abstract, without order. Her tattoos anyway. And the way she lives her life. If she asks me what I’m doing next Sunday, I can tell her. Tuesday. I can tell her that too.

I wonder if she learned anything about delayed gratification. I didn’t know much about it, only that there was something inside of me that wasn’t quite satisfied with jerking off for the sake of it. Having sex for the sake of it. Like the ejaculation was a hollow victory. Easy gratification. Exactly what Ian’s life was about. His short life.

So I went the other way. Work hard, play hard, get rewarded. In all things. No instant gratification, no hollow victories, no easy wins.

I shift my focus back to Jen because as disciplined as I have been in the last ten years, she’s testing my resolve with every feathery breath, with every squirm she tries to hide, even when she licks her lips, swallows, blinks.

I can’t see the last three in the dark but I know she’s doing them all and I know they’re sexy. I slide my palm over her knee and lower. “Did you have trouble finding boots?”

Silence meets my question. “You have to say it out loud, Jen.

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